There is one fact of life that has often been pointed out to me, and I find it simply baffling: People who have dogs tend to look a WHOLE lot like their K-9 companion. I can only conclude that there are two possible reasons this happens:

  • People spend so much time with their dogs, they (this “they” could refer to either the dog itself, or the human. Perhaps even both) begin to take on their physical and personality traits.  In the “Nature vs. Nurture”, this is highly on Team “Nurture”.
  • People, being narcissistic by nature, buy things that remind them of their favorite person (themselves). Following this logic, they are unconsciously drawn to dogs that look and act like them.
I am usually glad I don’t have a dog. I’m especially grateful when I’m planning vacations, cleaning, putting on not-chewed-up shoes, not smelling like dog, and not getting licked in the face. (Truly, the only time I actually wish I had one is when I’m walking in the dark down an alley in the city by myself.) (Seeing as how this never happens, that’s how often I actually wish I had a dog.)  I figured that, due to lack of dog, the whole “people/dog-look-alike” law thing wouldn’t affect me, for lack of opportunity.  (Though, my roommate is beginning to look an awful lot like me. I’m crediting the fact that we come from the same gene pool instead of some silly ol’ law)
Laws of nature are funny things. Seems that when a person doesn’t own a dog, the law doesn’t simply skip over you… it picks a dog-replacement. Something else. I have, in fact, not outsmarted the laws of the earth as well as I had originally thought… for something else has been slowly morphing into a Paula look-alike:  My car.
As scary as this sounds, I fear my car shall soon become an identical twin to myself.  It started with the obvious similarities: we both look good in black, we’re both a little on the gassy side, and we both have room in our hearts for friends. As time has worn on, however, the similarities are becoming frightening: both of us have a rough time getting started in the morning, both of us have squeaky joints, and (most recently) neither of us have volume control (it’s either LOUD or OFF.  Those are your options).

But, for real, Bugzy is a great car. He usually starts when prompted, he plays nicely with other cars, and he has swell air conditioning (It’s 4×60… 4 windows rolled down 60 mph). Sure, I have to take out a fuze whenever I turn the beast off (or else he runs out of battery), the passenger-side door doesn’t open from the outside, the roof leaks and the fabric is falling off of the inside ceiling… but the thing’s a gem and I love it.  You can have your fancy schmancy cars… I’ll just bask in my 94 buick and hope that the next trait it picks up from me is the ability to speak Spanish. That would be exciting. AaaRRRRiba!